Self-Love

Feeling comfortable in my own skin. Words and phrases shared almost whimsically by your friends, colleagues, or parents.

How do I express love towards myself? What does it mean to be in a state of peace and gratitude with my own body, regardless of where I am and who I am right now?

It took me a long time to realise this:
As humans, we are born with the need to feel loved. The need to feel affection, the need to feel understood, the need to feel comforted.

Did you know that it starts from yourself?

If your cup is broken, no matter how much water is poured from the outside, it will always run empty.

If what is written resonates with you, I urge you to sit back, meditate, and write yourself a letter.

Be grateful for what you have achieved

It may not sound like much, but you have been in this world for [insert number] years!

We often tend to evaluate or paint a story of why things are bad, and how things are not working out for us. True – human life works in progression. The road ahead does seem long.

But have you looked back at your life to appreciate the progress made?

You have come a long way in your work, school, social, and even your family life. Even in the direst of scenarios where nothing seems positive, thank yourself for going through these experiences. The steps you took to try to make things better, the circumstances you were under – these are noteworthy mentions that deserve recognition and praise.

Appreciate yourself for your overlooked traits

When I mean overlooked traits, do not think small traits. That was what I used to think.

I used to not be proud of my natural empathy for people – my ability to understand and step into the shoes of others.

To me it felt like a psychological crutch which affected my masculinity and decisiveness.

I used to not be proud of my intellect.

I thought it was nothing to be celebrated. Who likes being a nerd?

I used to not be proud of my authentic nature.

I thought that men should always hide their feelings and look strong on the outside.

What I eventually realised was this:

Things that you do not appreciate in yourself can be seen as desirable traits by others. It is all a matter of meaning and perspective; a story you have painted in your mind: that these are undesirable.

Write these things down.

Thank your body, your heart, your mind for gifting you these gifts. Pen down the instances where they have served you well and know that you are unique and loved.

Because I exist – I am whole and complete

As you write your final thoughts, bring this letter to yourself in the mirror.

Look at yourself, sombrely but lovingly.

Read it out – word by word. Mean every word you say. Speak to your heart.

Give yourself a hug. Do you know what it feels like to hug yourself?

You deserve it.

Know that right now, you are love. Know that right now, because you exist, because the blood pumps through your heart and veins, and your hands and feet respond to your every command – you can still make a change in your life and the world.

David Lau

David Lau

A passionate individual who believes that life must be led with defining purpose. David is no stranger to anxiety, but also believes all things can be changed and overcome. He hopes to be a listening ear for the masses, and make a change in the mental health community.

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Last modified: August 19, 2021